Interview

It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon and my nana had gotten off from work not long prior to coming over to my house. We sat down in what was once called the “office,” but now is the second living room. I prepped her with a general idea of how the interview was going to go. Nana sat on one couch and I sat in the chair facing her. The video camera was directed towards her from the waste up. Then, I pressed record and began with my first question.

TL: What was your birth name?
SS: Sharon Kay Ott
TL: Where were you born?
SS: Plainville, Kansas
TL: How many were there in your family?
SS: What do you mean? Like my brothers and sisters?
TL: Mhmm
SS: I had one brother and one sister that I know of.
TL: And what were your parents’ names?
SS: Her’s was Opal Bradley. I don’t know a middle name. And his was Joy Ott is what I was told and that’s what’s on my birth certificate.
TL: What did your mom do?
SS: The only thing I ever knew her to do was waitressing. That’s all I ever knew.
TL: Did she ever talk about your father?
SS: No.
TL: What was your relationship like with your mother?
SS: I didn’t have one. She took me to the babysitter at 6 weeks and didn’t come back so pretty much I didn’t know her.
TL: Well that answers my next question.
SS: What was that?
TL: At what age were you adopted?
SS: I wasn’t adopted until I was 11 because they didn’t know they could. They were in their 50s and they didn’t know they could adopt me so they just kept me and she lived in the same town.
TL: Gotcha. So she just took care of you for 11 years and then?
SS: And then Opal came and got me to go on vacation for 2 weeks.
TL: How old were you?
SS: 11. And she also took my brother and we went across country and later found out I didn’t find out until I was like 15 or 16 she really was kidnapping us and that’s what it was called in the law because she didn’t take care of us and we got all the way to Wyoming and she turned around and came back. She was on her way to get Paula, my sister, and I didn’t know that until later.
TL: What were your adoptive parent’s names?
SS: Roy and Claudia Berry.
TL: Why did they change your last name?
SS: When they adopted me they legally changed it.
TL: They just wanted to make it official?
SS: Yeah
TL: So you said you were close with your or you knew some of Opal’s sisters, right?
SS: Yeah I knew Dorothy and Myrle and I can’t remember the one that she was a real heavy set lady, Viola. That was her name. But that’s really all, I mean I knew them but I don’t remember them.
TL: How did the adoption affect your relationship with them?
SS: It was really strange. I was talking about this yesterday. When I was part of the Bradleys, you know, I was their’s. Then when I was adopted it’s kind of like well she doesn’t belong to us anymore. And then when I went to Washington after momma died I went to Washington to live with Paula and her family and all of the Berrys didn’t have anything to do with me. It was kind of like whenever I left one family to go to another one it was kind of like well you don’t matter anymore.
TL: So after you moved in with Paula’s family you had nothing to do with the Berrys anymore?
SS: No
TL: So you haven’t talked to them since?
SS: Well no, not really.
TL: Did they have any other kids?
SS: They had two boys. And they were, when I was 11, 12 years old they were in their 30s so they were much older than me. Neither of them ever married.
TL: Oh wow.
SS: I know. And they’re both deceased.
TL: What school did you attend?
SS: Plainville Elementary School and Plainville High School and then when I went to Washington I went to Richland High.
TL: How old were you when you moved to Washington?
SS: 15 I think. 15 or 16.
TL: Why’d you move there?
SS: Because my dad did not want to raise me in a house of nothing but men at 15, 15 years old. And I don’t know if he was worried about the older brothers or what the deal was but he wanted me out of that house.
TL: So he’s the one that encouraged you to move to
SS: Well he had, see I knew who my sister was at that point, but whenever, I guess he talked to them. Well, Paula’s uncle Paul used to live in my hometown and that’s kind of how they kept, I mean Maxine and Paul kept in touch with each other and they knew what I was doing, you know, they told me what Paula was doing so it was kind of how they kept in touch and knew what we were doing and once they did that we, they put me on a bus and I went to Washington.
TL: How did you deal with that?
SS: It was good. They had six other kids. Well, there were six counting Paula and she also took in foster kids so at some times there were 17 kids in the house. Sometimes 7 teenagers at the same time. We had a ball. I mean it was great, but it was a whole lot different than being raised as an only child because pretty much I was, you know, but it was fun. I mean we had a good time.

My nana (right) and her sister Paula (left) reunited after 12 years

TL: Where was your first job?
SS: Oh my lord, my first job? Probably waitressing.
TL: Okay
SS: Yeah probably.
TL: Do you know about how old you were?
SS: Probably, let’s see Timmy was 2. Probably 18, 19, 20, somewhere in there.
TL: How old were you when you first met Robert?
SS: Oh my lord, I was 18.
TL: You were 18? Where did you meet?
SS: I think he worked at a store down the street from my house.
TL: In Washington?
SS: Mhmm. And the only reason he was there because he’s from Missouri. The only reason he was there is his aunt and uncle lived there and he came out there and started working.
TL: Okay, I was wondering about that because I knew he wasn’t from Washington.
SS: No he wasn’t from there but his aunt and uncle were.
TL: Very interesting. How old were you when you got married?
SS: 18.
TL: So you got married soon after?
SS: Yes.
TL: Seems to be a trend with you Nana.
SS: And your father was not a nine month baby.
TL: Okay, makes sense.
SS: He was an 8 and a half month baby but he wasn’t a 9 month.
TL: That makes sense then.
SS: Now I got married in February, he was born in October and he figured it up one time. I’m like you were premi. He said that might work for some people but not for me.
TL: That’s funny. What was your relationship like with Robert?
SS: In the beginning it was fine when we lived out there, but as soon as we moved back to Missouri his mother took over and ruled the roost and it just went downhill from there.
TL: What was his mother like?
SS: His mother was a wonderful person is the sad part but she never thought I was good enough for him never thought, of course once he married Brenda I was wonderful but
TL: I can imagine.
SS: I mean she would tell me how wonderful I was and would I please take him back and all this and I’m like you hate my guts. Why are you wanting me to take him back?
TL: She hates her more.
SS: Because she hates her more than she hated me. But I never could do anything good enough for him, you know. Couldn’t iron good enough, I couldn’t cook good enough. I couldn’t do anything good enough for him.
TL: Did that affect you emotionally?
SS: Probably as a young person, probably. But I don’t remember.
TL: Did she ever, like as a mother, did she ever put you down in that way too?
SS: I’m sure that she did to him. Not to my face.
TL: And you were 19 when you had my dad right?
SS: I was 18.
TL: You were 18, okay.
SS: I turned 18 in March and he was born in October so there ya go.
TL: So you got married when you were 17.
SS: 17, yeah I did, yeah because it was February 27th I believe it was.
TL: Oh gosh. What was it like becoming a mother?
SS: Because I was so young and because I had so much influence from her, I hated it. I really did. I mean I loved Timmy, but he was a collique baby and he cried all the time and it was, it was really hard, but um, and I had no help from him. He was just absolutely useless as far as, you know, being helpful.
TL: What did he do?
SS: He at the time worked in a camper place that they built campers. That was his job when we lived in Kansas.
TL: What made you decide to have a second child?
SS: I guess I wanted a little girl, I don’t know. I think that was why. I wanted a little girl. And our marriage wasn’t horrible the whole time. It really wasn’t. As long as we didn’t live close to them we did okay until they came around and then she would nit pick.
TL: And you said she was a lot of the influence you had raising the kids?
SS: Yeah.
TL: How old were you when you had Lisa?
SS: 20.
TL: What were they like as children?

Lisa, my nana, and my dad at my house

SS: They were sweet. Timmy was um, he was, I mean because I was so paranoid that Hazel would think I was doing something wrong I dressed him to the nines all the time. He always had on little white sets and you know, I mean he’d go outside and play in the mud. You don’t put white on a kid, a boy especially. But I would have little white shorts and little jackets and I mean, you know, all that kind of crap and um, of course he’d go outside and play and get them muddy and they wouldn’t never come clean again. But um no, he was a sweet little boy. We could go to somebody’s house, he wouldn’t touch nothing I mean, you know, he was just a good little boy.
TL: And Lisa?
SS: Lisa was um, she was a sweet baby. She was, she was a sweet baby.
TL: Were they shy or like very outgoing?
SS: Lisa was very shy just like you. You reminded me so much of her when you were younger because she would just like, she would not look at you if you said something to her that little head would go down. It was pitiful. She was so shy. My neighbor talked me into putting her in a beauty contest one time. Hell, she never looked at the judge. It’s no wonder she didn’t win she never looked at him because she’d just sit with that little head down. She was so shy. And she still is to a certain point, you know about a lot of things she’s still very timid.
TL: Non-confrontational.
SS: Yeah very much, very much. They were both very good kids until they got a little older.
TL: Then they just went downhill.
SS: They went poof.
TL: Were they involved in sports?
SS: Timmy was a football player big time. And um, would have still played in high school if he hadn’t had a doctor that told him he couldn’t. And he could have. But I don’t think he would have ran into all the problems in life that he did if he could have continued to play because you can’t do drugs and play sports and he wouldn’t have you know and so I think that ruined him. That wasn’t everything, I mean, he’s like a magnet to bad people so
TL: He’s a magnet to everyone.
SS: Yeah, exactly.
TL: And did Lisa play any sports?
SS: Uh, no she is klutzy as all get out. But she was a little cheerleader and she was a little drum majorette and all that when she was little.
TL: How long were you and Robert married before you chose to get a divorce?
SS: We were married 12 years. 7 of those I should have gotten a divorce. It was like 7 before it did.
TL: And how old were the kids?
SS: 8 and 10.
TL: Okay. Why did you get a divorce?
SS: Because I found out he was messing around and he was just such a drunk. He truly was an alcoholic and it was all the time. It wasn’t a beer on the weekend or a 6 pack on the weekend it was like every day and it would be to the point that he was just drunk.
TL: After you got divorced, what did you have to do in order to support your family?
SS: I worked at a grocery store as a head cashier and then I, no I worked at a school when I first got the divorce in the cafeteria where Timmy and Lisa went to school and that way I could take them to school with me, take them home with me and it worked out really well and then I got the divorce and I thought, I cannot support them on what I’m making so that’s when I went and got another job and I worked at a grocery store for a while and then, then I ended up going to the hospital and that’s where my working for the medical field started.
TL: When did y’all move to Georgia?
SS: When Lisa was one year old. She turned a year old in January and we moved that May.
TL: And what moved you here?
SS: Lockheed. Bob came here for Lockheed.
TL: How long after your divorce did you meet Chuck?
SS: Oh goodness. 5 years. Because I dated somebody else for 4 of that 5.
TL: Oh really. What was his name?
SS: Chuck.
TL: What happened with that?
SS: I don’t really know. It never really finalized. So it, I mean I have spoken to him several times and he’s on facebook but I, and I’m trying not to talk to him.
TL: Why did you decide to marry Chuck? The other Chuck.
SS: The one that I married. I loved him, but it was different. It was more out of security in the beginning. I was just tired of doing it myself. And he, bless his heart, worshipped the ground I walked on. He literally did. Why? I do not know, but he did.
TL: How long were you two married?
SS: 5 months from being 20 years.
TL: Wow, I didn’t realize that. How was he with Lisa and my dad?
SS: Oh he loved the kids. Love love loved them. He um, I remember one time he um, it was before we were married and Lisa was there and he said, “sweetie go clean your room.” And she said, “I don’t have to. You’re not my dad.” You know how little kids are. And he picked her up and he set her up on the counter and he said, “No baby I’m not. I am not your dad, I’m not trying to take your dad’s place, but I’m putting the food in your mouth, the roof over your head, and the clothes on your back. Now get your little ass in there and clean your room.” And that was the end of it. And he just picked her up, set her back down and she went and cleaned her room. He said, and he never raised his, he never raised his voice to those kids, ever. But your daddy to this day respects him, unbelievably. He was with him when he died. Your dad was. I wasn’t there. I wasn’t there. I had left to go take a shower and it was meant for it to be that way.
TL: I think Lisa mentioned one time that Robert had kidnapped them?
SS: Yeah, mhmm.
TL: What was, what was the deal with that?
SS: He um, was it the time that he went to Missouri with them?
TL: Maybe. Or you moved a bunch and you had to hire a private investigator.
SS: Oh oh oh oh it was when I was single. Yes. And I could not keep them with me. I didn’t have the place to keep them, I didn’t have the money. You know, he never paid child support ever. So I didn’t have the money and so they went to live with him.
TL: About how old were they?
SS: Oh God, 11… 11 and 13, 12 and 14. I’m not sure, but maybe not even that old because maybe, maybe 10 and 12. I’m not sure. But all of a sudden they were nowhere to be found. They moved from Smirna, Marietta area to Conyers on the other side of I-20, no forwarding address, had their number changed. I couldn’t find them. And I’m like, I’m supposed to get them whenever I want. I have custody. I couldn’t find them. I had to hire a detective to find them.
TL: Financially, how did that affect you?
SS: Well, I ended up paying the detective but not near what I would have paid somebody else because he was a friend, but it didn’t affect me financially, I mean, well I would have paid whatever to find my kids, but that’s when I went to get her, I mean I called over there to get her one weekend and Brenda said she couldn’t come because she had not done the dishes or something and that was her punishment and I said, “Oh no. We’re not going to punish her with me. You’re not using me as punishment.” I said, “I’ll be to get her.” And I said, “Pack her clothes. I’m on my way.” So I went and got two girlfriends of mine and we went to Conyers that night. It was late. And oh my god they lived out in the boonies in a trailer and, which nothing is wrong with a trailer, but me and her got into it. She slapped me and I slapped her back and we had a fight. I’ve never hit another human in my life, but she had her finger in my face and I moved her hand and when I did she hit me and that’s when, she’s got scars right here because I scratched her face. She tore my coat, I mean she was vicious. She kept saying “Call the cops, call the cops.” Ilene I think it was she said something about call the police, call the police. I said, “Please do because I’m going to go plead guilty and I’m going to come back and I’m going to kill you. Which I wouldn’t have but oh I was so angry. I was like you’re not going to do my kids this way and I took Lisa home with me that night.
TL: So y’all moved around a lot. Do you know about how often you moved?
SS: Oh my lord. It seemed like every time we moved the kids would go to a different school. I mean it was a horrible thing for them to go through, it really was. That’s one thing I give your mom a credit for because you didn’t go to different schools. You know what I’m saying? Even though she’s had several homes she’s always maintained having you in the same schools and I think that’s so important. Now I do. At the time surviving was important. That’s all I cared about, but not realizing what all it does to kids. I have no idea how many times I moved. I don’t. I know I lived in an apartment at Sweetwater, I lived in a trailer in Lithia, I lived, well I guess it was Douglasville, Lithia, whatever. I lived in an apartment when I first got the divorce in Douglasville. I lived with Sandra on six flags drive. It was a lot of times.
TL: When did my dad start getting into trouble?
SS: He didn’t really get in trouble until, well he got in trouble one time with Powder Springs, but it was because of the neighbor kid because Timmy was a follower, not a leader and he was with this other kid and I truly believe that with this other kid that went and stole some stuff out of a junk yard and Timmy, even though Tim did not climb the fence he wasn’t even on the inside of that junkyard. The kid was throwing the shit over the fence and he was getting it and putting it in the car. And the bad part was, Timmy didn’t have a car, didn’t even have a license. He wasn’t old enough. And that’s what the cops and me were saying “Why did you do this? You’re not even old enough to drive and you’re helping this guy steal stuff for vehicles.” He said, “That’s stupid.” He said, “You have to learn now while you’re this young. Things like that are dumb.” But that was the first time and he was on, it wasn’t even probation. It was juvenile. It was in juvy court but his first real trouble was when he and your mom were involved, but he saved your mom’s butt, but she was as guilty as he was. But that was the first time and he was, what was he 20, 21, something like that.
TL: They weren’t already married?
SS: No, that was in Ellijay when he got caught.
TL: And he went to jail, right?
SS: Mhmm
TL: For how long?
SS: He was sentenced to 15 years, but he only served 6 months because the jails were so crowded and it was a non-violent crime so he got out. And thank God for that because if he hadn’t I don’t know what would have happened to him, it’s just like your brother. I don’t know what would have happened if he’d of stayed as long as Shane did. I just don’t know.
TL: And how did you deal with that?
SS: Not real well. I grew very old in 6 months time. He even told Lisa one time, he said, “God look how old Momma’s getting. And I’ve done this to her.” But it is what it is. You go through it and you survive.
TL: And when he got out, did things change?
SS: No, not for a long time. I think he was more careful with what he was doing, but he got into the meth and I think that was his downfall. He had to hit rock bottom before he got over it.
TL: How old was he when he and my mom got married?
SS: They got, I’m trying to think. It was in the late 80s. I could be wrong, but I want to say it was 88, maybe. I think, I’m not sure. I don’t even know if I have anything to look at to see how old it was. I want to say it was the late 80s that he got married.
TL: Did you approve of the marriage?
SS: Yeah I did. Yeah, I mean your momma’s mom was so sick and I knew she wasn’t going to make it to the wedding and so, because I even asked the oncologist. I said, “Don’t tell them it’s going to be a year if it’s not because she’s in bad shape. And it’s already in her liver. She’s not going to make it a year and you know it. This kids are supposed to get married and if they need to move the date up to where her momma can be there then that’s what we’ll do.” And he said, “I can’t give them a time. We can’t do that. We’re not God, we can’t do that. No she’s not going to make it a year, but you tell them as long as you can to give them hope. But she lived three months, period.
TL: And how long after she passed away was the wedding?
SS: She passed away February 16 and the wedding was May 6, I want to say.
TL: How did that affect my mom?
SS: Your mom has never been the same. I don’t think she’ll ever be the same. I don’t know if it’s guilt. I don’t know if it’s guilt because she did the drugs and all the things that she did because Wanda was a wonderful person. You would have loved her. Your dad loved her. I thought she was wonderful. She never missed a day in court and Gina wasn’t on trial. She was a wonderful person. She really was.
TL: What kind of mom was my mother like when she had Shane?
SS: She was a good momma. She really was. She was a good momma to you. That’s what is so sad now. It’s like what happened? Because she was just so good with you guys as little ones. And then she just changed. I don’t know what happened. I think it was drugs. I really do.
TL: When did things start to turn between her and my dad?
SS: Oh goodness, I was like with them like I am with Lisa and Robert. I don’t come over here all the time. I didn’t go bother them. It’s not my place. If they need me they’ll let me know. I think there were problems way before I even knew about it because your dad started seeing Ty, but, and I’m not excusing that because he asked me could he bring her to the house and I said “No. Not until you are divorced. You cannot do that. I will not let you disrespect her. No matter what has gone on, no matter what drink.” I mean she started staying out late at night, having parties in the basement, and all this when they were still married and your dad would be trying to sleep to get up and go to work. And she’d be partying in the basement with all her friends and all that and he said, “I just couldn’t take it anymore.” So one thing led to another and it just went down the tubes.
TL: How old were Shane and I when we moved in with you?
SS: I don’t remember. I just remember the day she came to get y’all. It killed me.
TL: What happened that day?
SS: I was just hysterical because I knew you were going home to somebody who was so strung out on Meth it wasn’t funny. All the times that she would scratch her face and say that it was glass from the wreck, it was meth. They say, I don’t know because I’ve never done meth, they say it’s like bugs are crawling under your skin. I don’t know because you’ll dig until, I mean she had holes in her face. Horrible horrible holes, sores where she had just sat and dug the meat out of her face. It was awful.
TL: And she went to rehab that summer that we were living with you, correct?
SS: Yeah, Timmy took her. He found her on the side of the road in a car and he said, “I didn’t have a choice but to put her in the car and take her because she was so bad.” And I’ve still got the drug screen results that came out of that.
TL: Were there a lot?
SS: There was. A lot.
TL: Could you tell a difference when you would see me and Shane after going from her house to coming to her house or what not?
SS: Yeah because when you were with us or with Timmy you both would get good grades and all this. When you weren’t you weren’t interested in school. I think things were so bad. You know I remember Shane telling, when you were little, I don’t know how old you were because I wasn’t over there. I didn’t see it. I’m only going on what I was told. But you were cooking something in the microwave at whatever age you were and could have burned the house down because you had it set for hours, not minutes. And the whole house filled with smoke and all that. And she was passed out in a bowl of cereal at the table. It was bad. There were some bad things that went on. I’m not saying she’s a bad person. She just, she had no guidance after that because her dad was an alcoholic too. Bobby was a horrible alcoholic. I don’t know how Wanda ever put up with it. I really don’t.
TL: Do you think your childhood affected your relationships with your friends and family?
SS: I don’t think my childhood did.
TL: What was your relationship like with your adoptive mother?
SS: I didn’t really respect them, I think because they were older. Because they weren’t with the in stuff and all that. I loved them. It was the only parents I knew, but I took, I guess all kids do, I took advantage of things like all kids.
TL: How did you deal with Chuck’s passing?
SS: At the time when he finally did die, it was a relief because he had been sick for 3 and a half years and it was time.
TL: I know your weight has been something you have struggled with for a long time.
SS: Forever.
TL: How old were you when it became an issue?
SS: I’ve always been overweight ever since I was a kid in school. It’s gotten to the point now at my age it’s like whatever. I mean I’d love to be thin but you know I wished that about Chuck one time. I thought, “I just wish he didn’t have his belly. I just wish he could lose his belly.” Well, when he got really really really sick he did and I’m like, that wasn’t what I meant. So no I don’t need to be thin enough to get sick to do it. Probably if I was younger I’d have bypass surgery or something.
TL: How have you learned to deal with your weight?
SS: Just buy bigger clothes.
TL: Do you think it’s ever affected your personality?
SS: Yeah.
TL: You do?
SS: Mhmm
TL: Because you’re very outgoing and you can talk to anyone.
SS: I really can, but I cannot get up in front of a crowd or anything like that. I’m very self-conscious. I cannot do that. Or if I walk into a room of strangers it really bothers me.
TL: Does it really?
SS: Mhmm
TL: That’s funny because ever since I’ve known you you can talk to anyone. Anyone that walks in the room you’re like, hey how’s it going?
SS: I really can now. At this age you don’t care anymore. It’s like whatever.
TL: You didn’t use to be like that though?
SS: No. I used to be very, very shy.
TL: You did? I didn’t know that.
SS: Yeah I’m very shy. But as I got older it got better. And I think working in the medical field, I don’t know if that has anything to do with it or not, but you learn to be open with your patients and talk to them and all that.
TL: How long after Chuck passed did you meet Jack?
SS: Really not very long. It bothered me because it was like, should I date this guy? And then I thought, “Do I want to let him go and maybe miss out on the greatest thing that could happen?” Chuck died in September and we married the following May. I mean it wasn’t long at all. And I keep hearing lots of people say you should not make any kind of decisions, period, for one year after somebody dies. And I’m like, well what if I hadn’t married him?
TL: Do you regret marrying him that soon?
SS: No, no, no, no. Not at all.
TL: What is your relationship like with Jack now?
SS: Much better now. It got kind of crappy for a while. But it’s better.
TL: Did y’all have the fun relationship at the beginning?

My nana and Jack in the castle at Magic Kingdom

SS: Yeah we did.
TL: Why did you move to Tennessee?
SS: Because I was living in that house in Rosacka that was my Chuck’s and when he died it became mine, but his sister didn’t think that way. So I ended up having to sue her for it. We ended up not going to court but I had to get a lawyer because she wanted me to pay rent to live there and I’m like I don’t think so when I own it. You and I own half and half. That’s what the wills all said. Your mom and dad’s, Chuck’s. And I told her I said, “Look, I didn’t just meet Chuck on the corner last weekend. I was married to him for 20 years.” So it became really ugly and she had to pay me my half and I left. Jack said, “I am not killing myself here for something that we’re not going to have and I’m not killing myself here for something that’s going to belong to her.” I said, “I don’t blame you.”
TL: What was Tennessee like?
SS: I loved it. I still love it. But when Lisa had Rachel, had to come home. It was her only one and I knew it would be.
TL: What was it like becoming a part of his family?
SS: His family is wonderful. Wonderful people and they love me to death. They’re just, they’re great people. All of his brothers and sisters are really good people.
TL: Did Chuck have any extended family?
SS: He had a sister and his mom and dad and I didn’t like any of them.
TL: When did y’all move back?
SS: 2004
TL: So the year after Rachel was born.
SS: We moved up there in 2002 and then we came back in 2004.
TL: So not long.
SS: 2 years. And then when Lisa got pregnant with Rachel I’m like, um okay I’m not going to be able to do this long distance. So I called Doctor Wizner and I said, “Do you have any job openings?” And he said, “You coming back?” And I said, “I’m thinking about it.” He said, “I’ll make a place.”
TL: Did you like your job?
SS: There? No.
TL: While you were there you didn’t like it? Really?
SS: No. Hated it.
TL: Why?
SS: Just were not nice people. They were ugly acting people. And I would cry going to work and cry going home and it aint worth it. So on the 4th of July of the year that we left in August we went for vacation to the lake. The whole time I was there I’m like I have to make a decision what I’m going to do. And made the decision and when I came home I just called work and said I aint coming back. I’ve never done that, ever. But I couldn’t do it anymore. I said, “Do you want me to come work another.” She said, “No not really.” I said, “Okay, I didn’t want to anyway.” I hated it. Oh my God I hated it.
TL: But you liked WelStar though?
SS: Yeah, yeah, yeah
TL: And your patients?
SS: Yeah, I loved my patients. I still see them, a lot of them. A lot of them come to the drug store now. It’s really funny. I went this morning to get breakfast for all of us and half of the patients that come in the drug store were at Lucky’s where I went to get breakfast and they were like, I just saw you and I’m like I just saw you. And then I get back to work and half of them come in the pharmacy and I’m like, I just saw you.
TL: Why did you decide to retire?
SS: I was going to turn 62 and I thought, “I’m going to take early retirement because I don’t know if I’m going to be alive when I’m 65.” So I took early retirement so I could get something out of WelStar I guess. But I took an early retirement just because I was like okay its time, I want my money. I’ve worked all these years and now I want my money.
TL: And how did you deal with that?
SS: The first year and a half or so I did great. And then I had everything painted, and everything refinished, and everything done and I’m like okay now I’m bored. And I hated it. I hated sitting around doing nothing. I don’t like doing that. I’m very glad to be working again. I like it.
TL: You’ve definitely done a 360 turn around. You just seem a lot happier.
SS: I am because I’m not sitting at home all day and I mean I was putting on weight and I was, all I was doing was sitting around eating, watching TV, sleeping, whatever. It was like, this is boring. And especially moving to the other house, it’s like, I don’t have anything to do, I don’t have anything to refinish. It’s all new.
TL: Do you enjoy working at the pharmacy?
SS: I do.
TL: Do you like the people you work with?
SS: For the most part yeah.
TL: What has been your greatest accomplishment?
SS: My children.
TL: What has been your biggest regret in life?
SS: My biggest regret? Oh my gosh. I don’t know of anything that I really regret doing. I don’t.
TL: You wouldn’t do anything differently?
SS: Probably not. No I can’t think of anything that I really would change.
TL: What is the most beautiful thing that you’ve ever seen?
SS: Oh my goodness, I don’t know.
TL: Because didn’t you take a three day trip to Washington? I don’t know if there was anything along that trip.
SS: Oh I mean that trip was great, but the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. I don’t know if it would be my children and grandchildren’s faces. I don’t know because to me my biggest accomplishment was quitting smoking, but the best accomplishment was my children and grandchildren. But I would say their faces are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
TL: What’s your favorite color?
SS: I don’t know if I have a favorite. I don’t think so. Now Lisa’s would be black.
TL: That’s for sure. Buy her something, buy it black. What’s your greatest fear?
SS: I would think not being able to see or not being able to walk. I don’t ever want to get to that point. I would hope that God would take me before that.
TL: It’s not guns?
SS: No
TL: I thought you were terrified of guns.
SS: I don’t like guns, but I don’t have one so I’m not afraid of it because I don’t have it. But I am afraid of guns.
TL: What makes you cry?
SS: I think, like when Shane was in jail that made me cry. What else? If something’s hurting one of my kids or grandkids that makes me sad.
TL: What makes you laugh?
SS: You.
TL: This interview?
SS: No I just remember, you know how you sit around and think about things you’ve done with your kids and stuff. But just like you and I sitting on the couch looking at stupid youtube things cracks me up. My dog and my cat make me laugh because they’re crazy. Just silly things.
TL: Robert fixing the fluk capacitor?
SS: Yeah right. He’s such a little turd. He’s such a sweet kid. I love him dearly.
TL: What word do you hate the most?
SS: Oh goodness, I don’t like people to say G-D. I hate it.
TL: I thought so. I figured that was it.
SS: I don’t like that at all.
TL: What’s your favorite curse word?
SS: I can’t say it on camera.
TL: You can this one time.
SS: Fuck. You knew that was coming. I have always said that’s the most descriptive word in the English language. If you tell somebody it’s raining outside, who cares? If you tell them it’s fucking raining, they’re going to look.
TL: What is one thing that you want to do before you pass away? Not that it’s coming anytime soon. One thing that you wish you could do.
SS: What do I wish I could do? I don’t know.
TL: Travel somewhere?
SS: I don’t want to go out of the country.
TL: Skydive?
SS: God no. I’m terrified of heights.
TL: I know you are.
SS: Used to I wanted to go to Australia or someplace really cool like that but I don’t really want to travel out of the U.S. anymore. It’s like it bothers me. There’s so much meanness I don’t know if I want to go out of the country. Maybe Hawaii someday, I don’t know. Who knows? I’m almost 70 years old, who cares at this point?

Following the interview, I still had a lot of unanswered questions. I was a little nervous going into the interview because there were some things I asked her that I normally would not bring up in casual conversation. Although I had a list of questions, I kind of wish I would have just had a normal conversation with her. Our conversations typically flow very well and there is never a pause in the conversation. However, the interview consisted of mainly questions and answers and very few details in between. Also, some of my questions jumped all over the place. If I had the chance to redo the interview I would have nothing in front of me and I would just sit and talk with her just like normal. Overall, I think the interview was a success. It gave me more insight on my nana’s life. It showed me how strong she is and how she has overcome so much. If there was one detail that I would take away from the interview it would be to have no regrets. Every decision, obstacle, and mistake has given her a life full of love and joy and I hope to have the same outlook on life not only when I’m sixty seven years old, but also right now.

My grandmother and I grew up in very different times in some ways, but also very similar environments. Both of us were raised by two parents other than our biological parents. However, they were under very different circumstances. My grandmother was adopted eleven years after being dropped off at her babysitter’s house by her mother. I on the other hand, chose to live with my aunt and uncle for a more stable environment and a better life. Furthermore, my grandmother got married and had children at a young age while I have chosen to go to college before getting into a serious relationship. My perception of the ways of live when my grandmother was younger changed after the interview. I have always heard about expectations for women, but I did not understand until the interview how much children relied on their mothers. My grandmother’s ex-husband offered no assistance with their kids before and after the divorce. Today, I see more fathers involved in their children’s lives. This project helped me to feel more comfortable when asking my grandmother questions about her life. However, I wish I would have asked her more detailed questions and I would not have videoed her if I could do the project over in hopes that my grandmother would feel more comfortable and the conversation would have flowed better. If the roles had been reversed, I would talk about the importance of my family and the impact they have on my life. I would talk about how my friends have been such an important part of my life. I would talk about things I would do differently if ever given the opportunity, but still know that my decisions and mistakes have helped me learn in grow in more ways than one. I would tell stories about me sitting around with my friends and family talking and sharing stories, spending time together and living life together. I would want people to know how important the people in my life are to me.